funny video + joke

The young Hilly Gross being "honest" about how FFB's feel about BT's. This has been going around the email circuit, so some of you may have seen it-- for those who haven't, it's worth every hilarious second (beginning at 1:09).



Sorry, JOKE DELETED.

Too bad.

IDF... Israelis Dig Football

Soldiers at a Nizmit hill base watch Argentina face off against Germany in the world cup as they await orders to enter Gaza (Limor Edrey). More on soldiers and soccer here.

“A price has to be paid. We are dealing with pure evil here.”

Says J.K. Rowling on killing off two characters—possibly Harry himself—in the seventh and final installment of the Harry Potter series.

So sad. So true. And I could care less about Harry Potter. Pure evil thrives, while we pay the bitter price.

The strange things in life, such as, not talking to Jews during lunch break, voting for Ann Coulter and more...

• Calling a business associate in Texas and getting a response through a secretary, "I don't talk to Jews during lunch break. Call back later." The humorless secretary was mortified. Poor thing.
• Wondering if these people are for real. No, not Ann Coulter, but those who find it necessary to actually say she's crazy instead of assuming, the way I do, that everyone already knows.
• Having a toddler at home who loves to scream "Oh my gosh" before the most random statements. Only for the last week of this lovely month of June it's been, "Oh my gosh, it's raining." Every morning.
• Driving alone with the windows down and listening to the radio on full volume. Pure summer fun, until you discover that one of the last decent music stations has been pulled off the air for lewdity and everyone else is playing Paris Hilton's muzak. The irony.
• Reading about the unidentifiable junk people get for their wedding gifts on Slate and laughing uncontrollably, because not only did I get a gerunkensplunk, but it was broken. The perplexed groom and I ended up settling on two possible choice, either a water filter (this was in the pre-copipod age) or a miniature Tower of Piza model that doubles as a hat stand with wires to charge a cell phone.
• Attending a wedding so boring that the only thing more exciting than the fact that they had an open bar was that noone else was using it.
  
• Reading about Jameel's midnight adventure at the grave of Yehoshua ben Nun and remembering my midnight adventure sneaking into Beit Lechem at the start of the intifada. Back then I was more thrown off by the christmas decorations everywhere than the fact that if my car had been stopped by PA police, I would have been out of Israeli jurisdiction and at their mercy. Stupid American!
• Having a late Saturday night visitor (after a long and busy shabbos) look around my apartment and say, "I'm so glad to see you're not a neat freak." Sure thing, sherlock.
  
• Telling my grandfather about all my "accomplishments" in school and at work, but only seeing his eyes light up when I tell him that I painted the walls of my corridor and kitchen by myself. The things a girl can do to make her old man proud.
  
• Justifying not talking about yesterday's attack in Israel by saying I'm not a news source for anyone. But neither is he, nor he, nor she, and yet they have the guts to put their thoughts into words. Well, my gut is too wrenched to speak, so I'll let the other do it for me.
• Finishing a great novel and thinking, "I should write a book", because what could be better than really moving people. But then, what in the world would I write about?
• Discovering that the second most powerful 2 words, "I'm sorry," can fend off the most powerful 2 words, "You're fired".

With that I end this Monday morning edition of "The strange things in life". Please feel free to add your own take on this phenomenon, because let's face it, it's only getting stranger.

A telling Commander-in-Chief moment

Watch This!

Miss Yerushalayim - what a babe

Miss Yerushalayim

That's actually my sister, who I dressed for Purim and photoshopped onto Jerusalem stone. I wrapped her in the flag of Yerushalayim and painted her (now blurry) face blue and white. The poor girl got into trouble at her school chagiga for dressing up in a questionably Zionist costume, but nothing compares to how much trouble I almost got into for getting the flag in the first place.

I spent a year in an Israeli seminary. Needless to say my ultra-orthodox school did not celebrate or partake in any Zionist events. We even had a written policy that forbade students from attending rallies, demonstrations or the like. The girls who listened to these rules went through the year as though they were in a sunnier Brooklyn; but I wanted an authentic Israeli experience, so I took my chances.

Yom Yerushalayim eve, a friend and I slipped out of the dorm and headed to central Yerushalayim. We marched all night with this very flag on my shoulders, stopping often to sing and dance (Ezzie has more on the march) . The achdus, the feeling of togetherness and peace and faith in being a people, was palpable. Finally reaching the Kotel at dawn was such a climax, such a height of inspiration, that it's difficult to express in words. My friend and I had to steal back to the school dorm before anyone noticed that we had been gone all night.

Back at school I couldn't tell anyone where I'd been, but I secretly reveled in the knowledge that the Jewish people are as strong as ever, as inspired as ever and still connected in a real way to Hashem who performs great miracles for us. That flag of Yerushalayim lay secretly tucked away with my luggage for the rest of the year. When I got home I wanted to fly it from my rooftop for the world to see just how good I felt about being a Jew. That wasn't practical, so instead I waited until Purim and wrapped my unknowing little sister in it. Ironically, this Yom Yerushalayim she is the one in Israel attending Seminary. I hope to speak to her tomorrow and hear that she too stole away to be part of the greater Jewish experience.

See also: Tsanchanim Bakotel.

Unchecked Russian Immigration to Israel Hurts Russian Jews the Most

The Jerusalem Post reports: "The Great Synagogue in Petah Tikva was broken into and desecrated on Thursday morning. The perpetrators drew swastikas on the walls, on the ark and on Torah Scrolls. They also wrote 'Hitler' on the doors of the synagogue and flung the contents of the ark onto the floor. They covered every Jewish symbol with spray paint and signed the name Rammstein - the name of a German heavy metal band who some associate with neo-Nazism. They also drew the symbol of a known devil worship cult on the synagogue's walls.
[...]
In July 2005, the government opposed a proposal by Shinui MKs to strip individuals engaged in neo-Nazi activities of their citizenship. The bill was submitted following reports of non-Jewish Russian-speaking immigrants who have become involved in neo-Nazi activity in Israel. Earlier that year a Russian-born IDF soldier with a swastika tattoo on his left arm, who admitted to maintaining contacts with neo-Nazi groups abroad, was arrested in Ariel. His mother was also detained for questioning after she spoke of her hatred for Israel and expressed support for neo-Nazis."

The rate of anti-Semitic vandalism and assault has increased dramatically in Israel over the last ten years, following the increasing rate of Russian immigration. The Law of Return, which remains unchanged since 1970, states:

1. Every Jew has the right to come to this country as an oleh**.

2. (a) Aliyah** shall be by oleh's visa.

(b) An oleh's visa shall be granted to every Jew who has expressed his
desire to settle in Israel, unless the Minister of Immigration is
satisfied that the applicant

(1) is engaged in an activity directed against the Jewish people; or

(2) is likely to endanger public health or the security of the State.

"(3) is a person with a criminal past, likely to endanger public
welfare.".

The Law of Return has been under much criticism lately since this relatively lenient immigration policy has afforded many non-Jews and Jew haters, particularly Russian neo-Nazis, to enter Israel and receieve citizenship. The Russian website Darkon. ru promised to deliver Jewish identity cards and Israeli passports in a mere 10 days for 10,000 euro. The site assures non-Jews who wish to enter Israel that, "The Russian law from the year 1993 enables one to declare by means of a court of law and with no proof at all of a change in one's nationality, among others, to a Jewish nationality, which entitles the Russian to the Law of Return and therefore entitles him as well to make "aliyah" to Israel." In addition, anyone with a non-Jewish grandparent may apply for automatic citizenship.

Now, why would a neo-Nazi or anti-Semite choose to immigrate to a Jewish country where they'd be immersed in the people and culture they hate? The case cited in the JPost article, of the IDF soldier who was arrested for association to neo-Nazi organizations. He was a kid with a swastika tatoo and a room full of nazi literature, but his mother was a full fledged neo-nazi supporter who, when challenged, said she immigrated for the absorption package.

I found an old record of anti-Semitic incidents (pre 2000) perpetrated by Russian immigrants on the website Pogrom.org.il.

• 1999, an inscription appeared on the wall of the “Binyan Klal” building in Jerusalem: “Death to the zhids; may Russia be glorified.” Under this slogan was an SS sign .
• On February 26, 1999, Novosti Nedeli reported on the appearance of swastikas and slogans such as “Long live great Hitler” and “The end of the Jews is near” on the building of the Sharon cinema in Netanya .
• The July 15, 1999 issue of the Russian-language daily Vesti published a photograph taken in Ashkelon showing a swastika and an inscription proclaiming “Death to zhids” written in Russian; the author wrote that swastikas and other, similar inscriptions can be found in many locations throughout Ashkelon (this information has been confirmed by numerous statements) .
• On August 1, 1999, it was reported in Kiriyat Yam that an anti-Semitic organization of teenagers, known as “olim,” were breaking furniture and fixtures in a local synagogue, and had harassed people there (reported in Hed Hakrayot” and others) .
• On October 13, the Jerusalem Russian-language weekly Our Jerusalem, published a brief article about a male student of the “Boer” school in Jerusalem who stated candidly, “I am a fascist and I am going to kill all the Jews.” The boy wears a swastika openly, and threatens to return with his fascist friends.
  
• On October 17, 1999, the Israeli public learned about attacks to three Bnei Brak synagogues, where walls were covered with swastikas and inscriptions of “Long live Hitler.” The information about that event was published in the Russian and Hebrew press, and it was reported that the perpetrators of the attacks had been identified. It was discovered that they were non-Jewish teenagers who immigrated from the CIS. All the media that had reported it made no further mention of the event afterwards. A year later I approached the local police station to inquire concerning any follow-up of the investigation, and I was told, “… an indictment has been issued … the perpetrators have been found guilty by a juvenile court” .

More recent incidents include the neo-nazi soldier and the repeated synagogue vandalism throughout heavily Russian immigrant populated cities (Beit Shemesh, Be'er Sheva, Petach Tikva). In addition to vandalism, there are many reports of beatings and intimidation using nazi slogans, etc...

What isn't clear in these reports and so rarely discussed in the criticism of the Law of Return is that most often the victims of anti-Semitism are Jewish Russian immigrants. While other Israeli's are highly offended by new comers to their land who hate them and want to destroy then, and while holocaust survivors are of course horrified by the use of the nazi imagery in the Jewish and supposedly safe state,the actual targets of thes incidents are most often Russian Jews.

The reason Russian jews immigrated to Israel in such outstanding numbers (somewhere over a million) is because they were the victims of terrible anti-Semitism and persecution in Russia for decades. At the first opportunity to leave, they did, and flocked in huge numbers to Israel's welcoming shores. However, when post-communist Russia's economy declined and many non-Jews (or people only distantly related to Jews) looked for a way to escape the poverty, they too immigrated to Israel, considering it not an aliyah but an immigration like any other, but with a hefty severence package.

Any Russian immigrant to Israel will tell you that settling, absorbing, finding employment are all very difficult. Besides for the standard prejiduce against immigrants, Israelis are especially wary of Russians, because many of them hold high level degrees in engineering or medicine, and they pose a real threat to an already tight Israeli job market. The Russian community has also become a formidable player in politics, with representatives in the Knesset (Sheransky, Lieberman...)--they by and large fall on the right wing spectrum, be it likud or Yisrael Beiteinu, and support a platform of perserving an all Jewish state, in other words, Arab free. Again, Israeli's resent that such a new and foreign population could have such clout in an issue that they have only recently become involved in.

Recently, some emigrees have reportely returnd to Russia, citing less prejudice and better economic opportunity in their homeland. I don't know whether the emigrees were Jews or not, but in most cases, despite whatever hardship they face in Israel, Jews are afraid of returning to Russia because of a high rise of recent anti-SemiNazis there.

The neo-nazis in Israel don't target Israeli neighborhoods or citizens, for the most part, because their actions would not be tolerated for a second. Instead, they target fellow Russian immigrants who are (1) used to being harrassed for their Jewishness, and (2) would take longer in reporting the incident because of fear of backlash against the entire Russian community. As such, the Russian Jews who escaped from Russia because of hatred and anti-semitism against them are facing some of the same home-grown hate in the Jewish land of Israel. The tragedy is that because of forgeries, and intermarriage, it's virtually impossible to seperate the Jews from the non-Jews in order to weed out those that pose a threat to Israeli society; so the general Israeli public condemns the entire Russian immigrant community and for these acts, when in fact, these are the very people who suffer from anti-Semitism in Israel the most.

Update: Video on Ynet- via westbankmama.

I dare you not to yawn... then I dare you not to take what you read to heart.

Yawning is a surprisingly powerful act. Just because you read the word “yawning” in the previous two sentences—and the two additional “yawns” in this sentence—a good number of you will probably yawn within the next few minutes. Even as I’m writing this, I’ve yawned twice. If you’re reading this in a public space, and you’ve just yawned, chances are that a good proportion of everyone who saw you yawn is now yawing too, and a good proportion of the people watching the people who watched you yawn are now yawning as well, and on and on, in an ever-widening yawning circle… And finally, if you yawned as you read this, did the thought cross your mind—however unconsciously and fleetingly—that you might be tired? I suspect that for some of you it did, and which means that yawns can also be emotionally contagious. Simply by writing the word, I can plant a feeling in your mind.

(Malcom Gladwell: The Tipping Point, p.10)

Gladwell above addresses what he calls the stickiness factor of features of a social epidemic, i.e. why some ideas or things catch on and become trends and others just don’t stick. Yawning is clearly a ‘sticky’ concept. The reason I quote this paragraph is not just to pull a prank on anyone who loads this page. (I’ll admit the image of everyone yawning at the computer is making me laugh, only I can’t really laugh because I’m still yawning… but back to my point.) Consider this statement:

Simply by writing the word [yawn], I can plant a feeling [of tiredness] in your mind.

The fact that just reading a word can immediately trigger an unconscious and involuntary response tells you that the “emotional contagiousness” of written material is unbelievably powerful. Information processing isn’t about the text that you mindfully read; it isn’t even about the infamous subtext anymore. Understanding comes as a result of a knee-jerk emotional response to the very base meaning of the transmitted information. Every input translates into a cascade of automatic psychological reactors which we hardly control.

The reason this bothers me is because it greatly undercuts the positive effects of free speech. In an open exchange of ideas, every party has equal opportunity to state their case and refute their opponent’s. But emotional contagiousness makes any refutation a moot point, because the initial processing of the offending opinion has profound effects regardless of its validity.

So when one critic after another tear apart anti-Semitic or anti-Israeli positions, they try to make it impossible to rationally uphold the hateful argument. However, the layman who is exposed to the argument is not taken by either side of the debate as it doesn’t concern them. The casual observer’s response is an unsophisticated emotional reaction to the implicit triggers-- a result that is most insidious because it doesn't warrant reevaluation.

I keep thinking about the average newspaper reading Joe who reads an article on the Israel Lobby paper and then keeps reading to learn how academics spin the facts. This uninvolved but sincere citizen will come away from the article having caught two emotional bugs: (1) don’t trust Jews, and (2) don’t trust the academic elite. Even if the second argument is ultimately more convincing, the impression of the first remains. The worst part is that because the hateful feelings are barely persceptible, Joe will never even have to feel guilty about having those thoughts--and they'll always be there.

My point is: if I make you yawn and then convince you that you’re not actually tired--you’ll believe me that you’re not tired, but you still will have yawned!